I don’t do the resolution thing. December 31st moving into January 1st is actually just another evening that changes to another morning. I don’t usually do a big festive whoop up, get drunk or feel an increased need for a sexual conquest.
Well it isn’t really just another day. It is a day when you get a brand new calendar, reflect on what you want the next year to bring and what you might want to avoid in the coming year. It is also a time to say, “Holy shit!!! How the hell did we get to 2014? We just squeaked into 2000 an eye blink ago!”
My mom’s birthday is January 7th and when I called her up to wish her Happy Birthday, her first words were, “Well I made it.” She’s 93 so it is more of a blend of surprise and resignation than what a wonderful world moment. My mother is perhaps the brightest woman I have ever known: still to this day; not used to be. She is very frank about being ready to go at any time and has seen many friends and neighbours pass and even her only daughter, so is frankly completely baffled as to why she is still here. I love talking to her and will definitely miss her but I won’t feel sad for her when she goes. I will be selfishly crying for me when I can’t call her anymore. I cried for my sister; although no one wanted to see her suffer any longer, it was a terrible loss.
So knowing how quickly time passes, now more swiftly than it ever has, what do I want from 2014. I said I don’t make resolutions, but I do have goals. I will audition for the NAC if I get granted an audition. I will kick my ass twice as hard to write my play which has stalled as I knew it would, because I know my own procrastinating tendency. I will be a cheerleader for my daughters as they move forward with their own lives and become more and more independent than they already are.
Many plan to retire at my age. I am exactly the opposite. I look forward to working at the things that truly call me and challenging myself to succeed in my avocation which was relegated to being a pastime for many years while I was a public servant.
This is the most often I have seen the first person pronoun in any piece I have written. Sorry about that. Hope your goals are met this year too.